A Toolbox

RULE OF LIFE

A rule is a way to get where we are going. It provides order, guidance, and direction in how to achieve what we want.

We begin with our core values—the things we hold most dear. The rule of life allows us to live into our core values. 

Living into our core values, we develop a set of dictums of practice. These guide us. They show us what works and doesn’t work. 

That allows us to develop meaningful goals, objectives, and strategies for getting there. 

Realize this is not a straight, linear process, but rather is one in which one might move up and down, side to side, back and forth—we will move freely as we experience success and failure, noting necessary changes and reforms. Rules are not meant to be kept by rote, but instead are meant to be engaged. 

Most of us unconsciously have a rule of life. We know what works. We know what doesn’t. The key is to make it conscious. Doing so allows us to fully engage with what we believe. We can see where we connect with the world. 

Here are the categories through which to make one’s rule of life conscious—

VALUES

RULES

GOALS

CHOICES

Something to consider is the idea of grafting—

grafting allows for better fruit

grafting keeps things diverse and healthy

Our baptism is our ingrafting into the core value of Jesus. From Jesus comes all else. He becomes our rule—the center from which all decisions, thinking, and action flows.

A community is the best means by which to develop and practice a rule of life. The community thwarts isolation. The community nurtures mutuality. The community holds us responsible. It keeps us sharing, supporting, and encouraging (even correcting) one another. It cements the grand affirmation, You are not alone. 

SPIRITUAL PRACTICE

Any intentional behavior that helps me be open to the presence of God in my life and the world around me is a spiritual practice. Thus, anything really can be a spiritual practice, but note clearly the word intentional—for an action to be spiritual, there must be meaning and purpose behind it—a choice to find God through it. A spiritual practice helps us get out of the way and allow God to be God. Marnie commented, The judgment of God is God’s tender mercy. A practice will correct us, but it will open us to fountain of grace. We discover God is not the God we imagine, but God IS. 

It can be forms of prayer (e.g., centering prayer); contemplative action (e.g., yoga); scripture study (e.g., lectio divinia); etc.—anything nourishing connection to the transcendent. 

Rhythmic repetition is good for the practice because it settles us. It also liberates us from the need to accomplish anything. Contemplation is the practice that leads to nothing. There is no product. There is no achievement. There is only being in God. 

Regularity is more important than duration. Daily practice for a few moments of intentional listening will garner more fruit than forcing oneself to sit still for hours constantly wrestling with a wandering mind. Regularity will quiet the mind eventually leading to longer moments of presence. You brush your teeth regularly, so sit with God regularly!

Do what works for as long as it works, then move on to something else.

Do what you enjoy. This simple rule is so easy to forget. Somehow we have connected rigorous discipline to spirituality, i.e., we disfigure our faces as we practice, earning the admiration of all (wink, wink)—Don’t be like the hypocrites who disfigure their faces so all will know they are fasting…, said Jesus. No wonder spirituality becomes arid practice. It should be life-affirming and life-giving. Enjoyment is a direct gate to the presence of God.

Adapt current activities to become spiritual practices. For example, practice mindfulness to whatever you happen to be doing, seeking God’s eternal presence in whatever is happening. God is always there—acknowledge that presence! 

VOCATION

Developing a practice helps become aware of what our vocation is. Vocation is the place where your deepest sense of who you are meets the needs of the world around you.

As we examine where we are vocationally, we need to work ourselves to a place of being free enough to be creative.

As we work, we create routines. Routines are patterns by which we order ourselves to get work done that needs be done. Routines are by nature repetitive. Repetition, though, can become imprisoning. It stifles creativity by reducing all things to the same steps done again and again. 

To be creative is to make adjustments and adaptations, to force ourselves to break from our patterns, to change our perspective, and see things differently as we try new things.

One of the things we always need to keep in mind is the spectrum that runs from vocation to job. One is the reason for our existence; the other is the means by which we finance our lives. We continually move along this spectrum—some days we find great power and meaning in our work; then others, it is just a slog; then still others we are somewhere betwixt and between. 

To tap into the idea of vocation—note when you responded to a call to be what you were made to be. This thread is more than likely woven through one’s whole life stream, but it gets hidden, veiled, and diffused by life itself. To find it, take stock.

The areas to consider are as follows:

Primary work

Fee work

Relationships

Spiritual practice

Volunteer work

Study

Recreation

Self-care 

See what you are doing in each of these areas—where is most of your time going? Where is the passion? What is under-represented? What is over-represented? Where do you need to grow? Are there categories not here?

Again, as with one’s rule of life, so much of this is unconscious, thus, going through the process helps us name what is there, bringing that hidden vocation to the surface, allowing it to become a means by which to evaluate all else. 

Interestingly, the much admired notion of balance may not be the end sought here. Instead, passion becomes the driving force. That is where focus needs to center—passion is the fire of life—allow it to burn brightly by engaging it, bringing joy to reality by making all thought, action, and, yes, even rest meaningful. 

Next, work to realize that there is a meeting point between one’s passion and what the world actually needs. That meeting point is one’s vocation. Note—that meeting point exists! But, yet again, it remains hidden until we focus on it. One of the truest dictums arising from quantum mechanics is that nothing exists until it is observed; it remains stubbornly potential only. So, take the time to intentionally seek that meeting point between passion and the needs of others. Make it real by seeing it!

We tend to settle at one extreme or the other. We will go all in on our passion; or we will slavishly lose ourselves in work that may meet a need, but feed no souls. This is why it is so essential to find that hidden meeting point.