Done and Done

A group we need to be aware of within our congregations is a group not found in the Pew research that is guiding so many church initiatives at the moment. This group is the “Dones.” The Dones are the backbone of many congregations and have been for nearly two decades. They are at least 65 years old, but most are in their 70s, and some in their 80s. They are part of the last generation that saw church as something people did as they raised families and found their place within the community as working adults. Most were also part of the last generation with most of its members having been raised in some sort of church environment. As such, they saw it as a responsibility to volunteer as their parents aged out of terms of service. They served as officers, Sunday School teachers, Bible School volunteers, youth leaders, committee members, etc.—all the ways people defined active church membership. They gave freely to stewardship campaigns, again because they saw pledging as part of the responsibility of being in a church. 

But you will notice my use of the past tense in much of the above paragraph—at least, I hope you do.

The Dones are aging out of their service. They are weary. They have used their creative ideas. They are looking for someone else to step up before they get completely exhausted with church—hence, why they are dubbed the Dones. They are literally and figuratively done.

Many congregations, though, face this need for turnover with nothing to offer. 

In the worst case scenario, it is because the congregation has not regenerated, replacing one generation of servant members with another. Yes, part of this problem is that the younger generations are absent, having decided that church is not part of becoming involved in the working years, raising their own families. But that is not the whole story. Newcomers—of all ages—no longer share the same definitions of active membership in a congregation. Consumerism is part of church attendance just as it is part of our culture. Folks come to church to consume programs, ministries, and whatnot, with no sense of needing to be producers of those things. They look to church staff and the folks already serving to simply keep doing what they’re doing. Moreover, church newcomers may come with no sense of community involvement. Religion has become highly individualistic—my faith practice is to feed my spirit, period. They come for worship and perhaps the occasional mission project, but with no sense of being part of a community that survives through full community participation. It is not apathy or being laggard, it is simply not understanding communal spirituality. For these reasons, the congregational lifecycle no longer contains periodic regenerations when one set of volunteers retires, replaced by a new set.

The consequences are becoming increasingly apparent.

First, without new faces, new ideas, and new approaches in the volunteer servants working church ministries, the pattern of we’ve always done it this way gets cemented in place. It is perfectly human to work a task in a way you know will work. Without new workers, patterns lock into place. Stagnation follows.

Second, tired people lead tired programs. When a Sunday School teacher has taught the same age group for years, habitual practice becomes the norm. When that teacher gets worn thin without a replacement in the wings, the enthusiasm, energy, and effort necessary for good teaching burns away. Newcomers arrive, place a child in class for a few weeks, but are distressed to hear the child reporting being bored stiff, or completely uninspired by the experience, or, worse, snapped at by a grumpy teacher. Parents will not voluntarily return to a place where the children aren’t happy.

Third, there comes a growing disconnect between the ideas of folks serving and the ways of the people outside the church. We tend to assume that how we see the world is eternal. We tend to forget that the generations rising have their own world views. A church’s message becomes unintelligible if there is no updating of idiom. The truth expressed may be eternal, but no one in 21st Century society would sit through a Karl Barth sermon from 1928 (all apologies to those of us who love Father Barth)! No, each time and place needs to have the message proclaimed in ways that are comprehensible. This idea was the whole impetus behind Eugene Peterson’s reworking of the Bible as The Message. Even he would agree, though, that there is already a need for someone else to tackle the same task now. The Message is nearly 30 years old, and we in America do not talk like we did 30 years ago—just think “tech industry and its impact.” 

So what are we to do?

Regeneration has to be a priority. The Dones need a rest. They need to pass the torch to new leaders. Most of them know this and would welcome a chance to be replaced. 

But how? Where will the replacements come from?

Ah…now there’s the rub! 

First, practice radical welcome. There is a plethora of seekers around us. Welcome them. The first big change, though, is not to wait for them to come to us, but to go and find them. We have to take our work as servants of Christ to the world. Folks right now will join what they see as someone working diligently for compassion, mercy, and grace. Let them. Take the compassion of Jesus into the world in action. Welcome anyone who wants to help.

Second, then as folks get comfortable working together, explain why you’re working. This simple explanation can do wonders at breaking down consumerist mentalities. Explain that by giving of oneself, emptying oneself, one actually becomes fuller, finding life more meaningful. One is not a passive consumer, one is actually fomenting change. Much as I am appalled at the political season upon us, one thing is inescapable—people will join an active movement that promises real change. Make that movement something wonderful—the compassion of Christ—and the change will be wonderful, not terrifying.

Third, thank the Dones profusely. They have held the place together. They have laid the foundation we build upon. Even as they will more than likely humbly demure from thanks, they deserve to be thanked. Make it so. 

Finally, realize that the old patterns are just that—old. What church participation looks like, how people become members, and how they practice membership will be different. There is no escaping that truth. Those of us with history in the church need to be open to church morphing and evolving into something we may not be at all familiar with. We see that happening. We cannot fear it; instead, we need to figure out how to embrace it. The Dones do not want a legacy that is stale and stagnant. No greater expression of gratitude could there be than seeing the church become a true expression of faith in the Living God.

So, let’s get to work. Let’s find new laborers because the harvest hasn’t gotten any smaller.