Love, Then Thanks

Colossians 3:12-17

Want to ensure that your Thanksgiving dinner does not descend into the caricatured abyss of family squabbles over the cranberry sauce? Follow Paul’s counsel! The Apostle offers the perfect recipe for a family gathering—practice love first, then give thanks with everything you have—all shall be well and all manner of things shall be well.

CLOTHE YOURSELVES IN LOVE IN ALL ITS FORMS

What a beautiful analogy for practicing love. We clothe ourselves in love, covering up in the warm blankets of compassion, humility, kindness, and all other forms of other-centered, self-emptying love found in Christ Jesus. We drape ourselves in his presence and praxis. What this means is that we need to do some preparation before entering the fold of our gathering. We have to get ourselves ready. Paul’s admonition here is a call to prayer. Before opening the door to guests invited, before descending into the fray of gathered family, or before entering the day’s first conversation, stop long enough to be sure heart and mind are on the same page. Check attitudes, emotional state, pertinent memories, and current anxieties about the coming meeting. Ask Christ to enter into each of those mental formations. Seek Christ’s presence in each piece that will direct your interaction with whomever awaits. Breathe. Then open the door.

Realize also that it takes some of us longer to get dressed than others. If you need to take your time getting ready, give yourself that gracious space to do so. There may be a particularly troublesome relative in the room—be sure you are dressed for the encounter—clashing colors work in relationships, too! If there is someone there on whose toes you know you trod, be sure to add the right accessory to your presence in meeting them. Note all those people with whom you love to laugh, cry, and talk with—dress for them. Recall the people with whom silence is the best drapery. Dress for it. Of course, there will be those wondrous saints who really don’t care how you meet them, they love you anyway—but still don’t go naked into that meeting—that is not good. 

All right, I may be beating the Apostle’s analogy to death, but bear with me. How we meet one another matters, and it is amazing how many times we hit an encounter dressed to kill when something else was far more appropriate. Spending time wrapping up in Christ’s love will help in all cases. It speaks volumes of how important we feel these people to be to us. It communicates how seriously we take this moment, even when it is going to be a moment of sheer joy. We laugh most fully when we know why we’re laughing. 

Set the stage and the drama fades into happy engagement.

NOW GIVE THANKS WITH EVERYTHING YOU HAVE

A favorite holiday memory from my children’s holiday seasons growing up was our annual trip to “The Nutcracker” at the Belk Theater in Charlotte. Oh, the ballet was always the same; but what was really special was getting all dressed up and heading uptown into the spectacular adornment of the Bank of America tower in which the theater sat. It was pure joy to get dressed to the nines and then act like it. Do you know what I mean? We laugh about being all dressed up with no place to go; so the opposite is a real moment of happiness—being dressed up and getting to fully enjoy it. 

Okay—that works with getting dressed in Christ, too.

As we clothe ourselves in Christ’s love, and use it, our ordinary table becomes sacred and holy, sanctified through the grace of Christ. Clothed in Christ’s love leads right into the great cry of happiness found in Psalm 133—“How good it is when kindred dwell in harmony together!” 

Clothed in Christ, we can give thanks for each person present in the gathering. They all bring something unique to the table. Without them, the circle would not be what it could be. Scroll through your times with each of them, finding the reason for why they are special. Tell them what they mean to you—it does not have to get all syrupy sappy unless that’s the way your circle rolls. Just tell them you love them. Thank them for being there. Enjoy them. That is one of the most powerful expressions of gratitude we have—communicating simple enjoyment of another’s company. 

Clothed in Christ, we give thanks for the occasion. It becomes a holy moment of recollection. As we gather together, we find the evidence we need that God is good and grace abounds. Give thanks for the times shared, the time spent with these people, and the hopes for their continuation. Pay attention this year when whichever patriarch or matriarch offers the annual dinner grace before the big feed—engage in it with full awareness, full participation, and full recognition of why it is necessary. 

Finally, and perhaps most importantly, clothed in Christ, give thanks to God for being good and for being there with steadfast love that endures forever. It is through Christ that comes the grace that makes such gatherings possible, that allows them to reconvene no matter what we have said or done when not so carefully dressed for the meeting, and that ensures that there can be joy in all things. 

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So, there you have it—a wonderful recipe for a really good gathering, and a perfect way into fully being present with one another. 

Use only as directed.

Thanks be to God.